Getting Married Twice

So I have a confession to make...many think this is real taboo and strange and not the "right" way to do it but it is what it is...we're getting married before the wedding day.

I know right?!

It all started when Nick got laid off. There was no way he was going to be able to afford rent on his own, neither of us have a ton of money saved away for him to live on for the next few months and we really wanted to be able to put more money towards the wedding. Naturally, the next step would be for us to live together - but we have a moral issue with that before marriage, so we didn't want that. THEN I found out that my roomate is screwing me over and ending our lease on January 31st (she apparently knew about this a long time ago but failed to mention it to me until mid December - nice). So that means that both Nick and I need a new place to live on February 1. So again - living together made the most sense. So we started discussing having a quiet ceremony and getting married before the end of the month so that we could A) live together B) he could be on my health insurance since he was jobless (and even now, he doesn't get his new job's insurance for 3 months) and C) we could save lots of money in order to put towards the wedding.

So we started discussing. Of course there are the cons against this - will the wedding day still be special? will the marriage for the 4 months before the wedding be normal, special or strained? which date is the anniversary considered? who do we tell or how quiet do we keep this?

We talked and talked about it and decided it was our best option for many reasons and that the cons weren't so horrible. All in all - I'll get to marry my love twice! We want to keep it prettttty quiet so that the wedding day is still really special and people aren't snickering the whole time about how we're already married. We still definitely want the big wedding and public pronoucement of our love and marriage in front of all of our friends and family. We'll wear our wedding bands when we feel like it and take them off when we're around people (or at work) that don't know. And we'll celebrate May 29th as our anniversary.

Nick currently lives in a 1 bedroom that is much too small for us so we're transferring within his building (right down the hall!) to a 2 bedroom that is only $40 more in rent per month. Then, that lease is up June 30th and we can move into a townhome to start anew! We're totally excited to get married and then still have our nice big wedding and party. We've already got our marriage license and we're figuring out the best day for my parents to come from out of state since they want to be there - and then we'll be good. I've got a dress to wear and it'll most likely happen at the church we're gettng married at with a pastor from there, too!

I'm a little nervous about things...but I think it'll be OK...