So next Tuesday is out one year anniversary. The first night that things really clicked with us on more than a friendship level was at this outdoor band concert we attended at Lake Harriet. That same concert is Monday night, which we’re going to. Then Tuesday DB supposedly has dinner plans and we’ll exchange gifts – NO idea what I’m getting him yet…yikes! And then that Saturday he told me to reserve for a special celebration.

We were supposed to go to Indianapolis this weekend for drum & bugle corps championships (we met in drum corps) which would’ve been awesome, but decided not to due to how expensive the trip would’ve been. So instead, he wants to do something special the Saturday after our anniversary to make up for it. Not sure what he’s thinking???

I just feel bad because I know he’s trying to hard to put every penny he can towards the ring, and here he is planning nice anniversary things. I hope whatever I end up gifting him makes up for it all and is just as special for him. I know the one thing he would say he wants is a new nice watch – but I’m waiting on that to give him after we get engaged as a sort of “engagement gift” – I know he’ll appreciate that since he worked so hard on the ring.

I’m trying to put all thoughts aside of a possible engagement during the anniversary activities…he’s alluded to the fact before that he won’t do it then and it’ll be it’s own special event. WE’LL SEE!

trends as seen in real weddings

The following are some pics I've seen lately from friends' weddings that feature current trends I've seen in the wedding world. Take a peek and enjoy!

Ashley and Jeff gave all the groomsmen white jackets - classy look!

Check out the beautiful BM dresses. And birds of paradise bouquets! Nice!

Rachel looks great in her hair to the side and floral piece. Also - check out that dress!!

Lauren & Marty go with yellow and tiffany blue for their scheme. Love the yellow flowers! Nice statement!

Jamie & James had a nice, country, subdued color scheme. I love the bridesmaid dresses - cocktail length and a pretty light sage/champagne hue.

Heidi and Matt are definitely a city couple. I love the shots against the cityscape!

Heidi's bridesmaids and bouquets - super cute!!

Matt's groomsmen in their chucks.

Gina's gorgeous halo ring!

Erin's pretty pale yellow BMs!

Love Ariann's dress with the cute sash!

to friendor or not?

The boy and I took a weekend trip to Madison this past weekend to visit his sister and while in route we found ourselves in, what else, wedding discussions. The topic this time? Music.

You see, DB and I are of the musical nature. We met in a music group, we have lots of musical friends, we routinely listen to music in the car that "normal" people would cringe at (and do!). So naturally, music is an important part of a big event as a wedding might be for us.

It all began with talking about the wedding party. You see - he has one sister and one brother and I have two brothers. Naturally, he wants his brother to be a groomsman and his sister to be one of my bridesmaids. No problem. Except what about my two brothers? If all is fair in love and war - my brothers would be both be groomsmen as well. But that doesn't leave very many spots left for DB to have friends in the line-up. So then I thought of the option of my brothers doing the ceremony music (not sure how considering one is an ex-trumpeter gone drummer and the other is a trumpeter). But DB countered with - "Um...have you not thought about the many, many friends we have that are excellent musicians that we could book for close to free?" and I'm all - "oh yeah."

the question at hand is this, my lovelies...do you use friendors or risk offending friends who have the same talent by hiring a "professional"?

We have numerous friends who have groups who could play at the ceremony, cocktail hour (will there even be such a think?), dinner and reception. But - would they rather enjoy the wedding instead of playing? Or would it be a smart move financially to hire a friendor instead of a vendor?

None the less - our wedding/reception will be a rockin' one...you betcha!

so a few weeks ago DB's grandpa (who has been in a nursing home for a few years and had diabeties, was 82, etc) was sent to the ICU because things had spiraled out of control - kidneys failing, all that good stuff. DB called me at my part time, evening job (which he never does) and told me through his tears. I left work immediately and he came and picked me up. When I asked him where he was he hesitated and said "on hwy 169..." sheepishly. I asked why and he said "don't worry about it." then i figured out that up 169 is where the jewelry store that we picked out that ring is! AH! we spent the day at the hospital and that night DB told me he was in the parking lot when his mom called him. MAN! We spent the next day with his Grandpa and family and then his status improved so we went home.

A couple nights later, DB was being super cute and antsy and he wouldn't tell me why. But he pressured me to ask questions (fine...twist my arm!) and I found out that he had gone and picked out the diamond and put money down on the ring as a whole. and he was BURSTING at his seams with pride and excitement. it was SO cute. I cried, of course.

His Grandpa continued to get better and then two weeks later (last Friday) they sent him back to the nursing home because he was going downhill again and he didn't need the hospital so he went back to where he was comfortable. We went to see him this past Sunday night and he was even responding to us (come to find out we were the last ones he talked to) and he passed away Tuesday morning.

DB is BESIDE HIMSELF. I never thought he'd be this torn up. I feel SO horrible - and hate seeing him in so much pain and hurting so much. We'll spend the weekend with his (big) family and be at the funeral events Sunday and Monday. He went to the funeral home Tuesday while I was at work and apparently everyone was asking him about when we were getting married (he's hardly ever with his family without me).

This has also brought up to me the issue of honoring passed grandparents at the wedding. I had never really thought of it because this was his first grandparent to pass and I don't have any still alive (none of which I really knew or were close with). But now that I know how close he was to his Grandpa, we'll surely figure something out.

Real Wedding

One of my old college roomates got married this past weekend. While I wasn't there, I do know how to grab photos from our other roomate, Maggie's, facebook album. :) Maggie and I have lots of fond and hilariou memories of living with Olga sophomore year. Maggie and I already knew each other and Olga was a transfer student who got placed with us - little did we know how lucky we were! We spent the school year learning bits of Russian, in awe of her beauty, going to Russian church and events with her, making fun of her for American things she didn't know and so much more. After college she moved back to Boston and now has married a good Russian man. Maggie said it was quite an event with all the Russians there and the reception was even a bit different because of their culture. Congrats Olga and Ilya!

Pre-Planning = a good thing (today)

I recently have been realizing how great of a thing it is for me to be doing all of the “pre-planning” that I’ve been doing before getting engaged. All though some days I feel like I'm driving myself crazy and I just need to be more patient...I think it's a good thing!

First, let me define what I’ve been doing…

• Reading blogs like crazy. (and starring the ones I will want to refer to in the future. Oh, how I love my Google reader).
• saving pictures that I come across. (electronically. And then putting them into a photobucket folder and tagging them correctly for categories.)
• making lists of things I want to remember/consider/love
• making a general budget and adjusting (up and down) as I read/see new things
• doing a general “mind dump” and seeing as much as I can see.

I have not been…

• making a list of things I hate (which I recently read is a good idea for working with vendors)
• reading/tearing up/etc magazines (but I wish I had been because I’d like a PHYSICAL book of my desires instead of all electronic. Hmm.)
• calling for quotes
• making actual plans that I have fallen in love with. Yes, there have been ideas that I love, love, love and hope that DB says he loves too and that they become possible. But I have not been saying “I’ve decided on X venue.”
  

Secondly, let me backup and explain the anal way my mind works. I’m one of those people that needs to see ALL of my options before I make a decision about something. This horrible need has become more and more cumbersome as I’ve become an adult. I’m the type that if I need a white v-neck sweater…I go and look at ALL the local stores to see what they have and then make an educated decision. Because otherwise, I know that if I buy the first one that I like, I’ll see another one later and regret buying the first one. The first time I realized that I had a problem with this was when I had to buy a new car. WHAT – I have to pick ONE car out of the thousands of models there are out there?! And let me tell you – it’s REALLY hard to make a spreadsheet of makes/models/prices/amenities involved in cars. It was horrifying. Mind you – I ended up with a great car that I love, but it’s just scary for me when I haven’t seen them all!

Another thing about my crazy head is that it is very linear. I’m a right-brained person who is musical and creative and likes to come up with new ideas, however – I’m also very linear in my thinking. When I look at things I love outlined type flow. For instance…when I’m on a website that I’m interested in – I look at the first link, and then any links off of that page – go back to the original page, look at the second and the following links there, back again, etc. When I find a new blog I like – I have to assess all the old entries that might interest me, and then look at all of their friends list to see if there’s anyone I like on their blog. THIS DRIVES ME INSANE. But I feel like I might be missing out on something completely wonderful if I don’t do it!

I know I sound like a nut job, so I’ll wrap this up. My point is…I’m glad I started doing everything I’ve been doing before even getting engaged because I’m slowing coming to the point where I’m like “I think I’d be fine with my blogroll the way it is without searching out/adding any more. I think I’ve seen enough examples of pomanders to decide on how I’d like them to look if I do them, etc.” DB and I are not expecting to be engaged for very long – around 6-8 months so if I hadn’t started any of this until then, I could very well have ended up in a nut house! I’m glad that I’ve been doing what I’ve been doing in order to have my head a bit more on straight when I do actually have to start making decisions.

Whew!

update schmupdate

oh hai guys. :)

here's a general summary of what's been going on....

• So a few days ago I had another hysterical moment where I got upset about how we're not engaged yet. I pointed out all the things he should've never said (about getting engaged in April, or how it'd only be a few months from when we first looked at rings in Feb, or how a short dating period and engagement would be fine since both our brothers and SILs did that, etc, etc, etc) and I cried. Basically, the dilemna was that the guy where we found the awesome ring for the awesome price would never return DB's emails or phone calls. And it's quite a drive to just go there and happen to see him or not. So that was dissappointing. Also, DB will be paying for the ring straight from the ole checking account and it was taking some time to build up the amount of the ring that I LOVED b/c I picked a pricey one (what a surprise, eh). That made me feel bad and we hashed it out and then the next day he offered to take me to look at rings again. WELL - I fell in love with a new one that was like $500 cheaper than the orig. nice. So that's that. Now who knows when it'll happen!
• I'm so nervous. I just can't tell if it's going to be sooner or later. I'm always reading too much in to everything, wonder if it's the time or not. oye!
• my job is driving me crazy.
• We went to my home in Iowa for Easter, I have a birthmother's banquet to go to Friday and Mother's day (a hard one for me) is Sunday. He'll be out of town for business the first week of June, his 10 year h.s. reunion is at the beginning of June.
• My brother and SIL are pregnant with their third!!
• I've been doing Jillian's 30 Day Shred for the last week - not consistently every day though. ah, well - got to be better than nothing!
• I've been thinking about an engagement gift for him. What have you guys done if you have? When did you give it? Should I just have it on hand so that the day after he proposes I can present him with it? I'm really thinking a nice watch because he talks about getting a new, NICE watch all the time. Thoughts?

mmmk - back to work. :)